Stephen left by ferry to Juneau on Sunday to start his Master's program with University of Alaska Southeast (UAS). He will be there working on an accelerated schedule through the end of July. Normally this wouldn't be such a big thing, but considering recent circumstances and our dedication to strengthening our relationship, in addition to the fact that this will be the longest we've ever been apart, this is a really trying time for both of us.
The kids and I made easy meals Sunday afternoon and spent lots of time cuddling. Porter slept in my bed with me last night. I think we all felt a bit of emptiness in the house. This morning we woke up to our normal routine. I was grateful the kids were able to occupy themselves quietly and without too much mess so I could sleep in a bit.
I worked an evening shift tonight. I like bartending on Monday nights. I make decent money and the pace is usually easy going. I dropped the kids off at Ventures (summer care) with a bag packed for them to stay with the gayparents. It was a very lonely afternoon all by myself, so I ran some errands and arrived at the Pub 2 hours before my shift.
Time ticks by so slowly when you're left to your own thoughts, without distraction.
My mood lifted once I started working. I had good customers and it was shaping up to be a good shift. My mind was still heavy with missing Stephen, but I felt useful and listening to other people talk about their lives and interests always seems to take the edge off of my own troubles. I did get to text Stephen a bit throughout the evening, but it was insubstantial and intermittent.
Toward the end of the night, I started feeling anxious to go home. I wanted to veg out and just rest. I started my closing duties early, but when I was cleaning a shelf, a glass beer pitcher shattered on my hand and took a nice chunk out of my right pinkie finger. I immediately placed pressure on it with my left hand and went to the sink to run it under a cold tap. It bled, and bled, and bled some more. I grabbed a fistful of bar napkins and applied pressure again, rushing to find my manager and some proper dressings. By the time I made it across the store to the kitchen (about 50ft), I had bled through all the napkins. I switched to paper towel and bled through several of those as well. We tried antiseptic and bandaids, but they were soaked through with blood within seconds. I grabbed a 3" gauze pad from the first aid kit, folded it twice and taped it with masking tape around my finger, then slid my whole hand into a nitrile glove. It seemed to do the trick, so I went back to work... but within a few short minutes, blood started to pool inside the finger of the glove.
My manager sent me home, saying that even with the glove it was too dangerous for me to continue working, especially making drinks. The other bartender made me promise I'd go to the emergency room to have it looked at as soon as I left.
So yeah, I headed across the bridge and had it looked at. The nurse commended me on my makeshift dressing. The doctor said he'd have given me a couple of stitches, had there been anything to stitch up, but there was no skin to connect, just a small gaping wound where a chunk of flesh used to be. At least it didn't have any glass left in it. I was eventually sent home with a fresh dressing, a tube of bacitracin ointment, several gauze pads, a roll of medical tape, and instructions to keep it dry and clean.
I've bled through the nurse's dressing since then, but it's slowing down now and it doesn't hurt. The thing is, I have 3 1/2 weeks to get through without Stephen and this was only day one. *sigh*
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